What Have I Done, LORD?

“My soul is weary of my life: I will leave my complaint upon myself; I will speak in the bitterness of my soul.  I will say unto God, Do not condemn me; shew me wherefore Thou contendest with me.”  Job 10:1-2

Job’s only outlet was to complain about his situation.  His friends weren’t helping, only criticizing.  It seemed to him that God was not listening to him.  He decided to allow his bitterness to take control of his words.  It didn’t seem that this was how he wanted to respond, but he could find no other way to vent his misery.  He was tired of living like a man wallowing in the gutter.  He decided that he really had no one else to blame except himself for his condition.  He was not a man who in the past had allowed bitterness to rule his heart, but now it was as if he was throwing in the towel, giving up that one last glimmer of hope for relief of his torment.

His earnest plea to the LORD was to request that God not condemn him.  It was as if he was saying, “Correct me, but please do not condemn me”.  God chastens His people to correct them so that they will not be condemned with the world (I Corinthians 11:32).  In maintaining his innocence, Job feared being found guilty of wrongdoing, pleading with the LORD to punish him as He must, but please not to write him off as an evildoer.  Job desired to know the reason for God’s judgment upon him as he asked God what he had done for God to bring such harsh measures against him.  “Why” is the question to which most folks desire an answer from God, but 99.9 per cent of the time, no answer is forthcoming, but only a simple “Trust Me”.  One can spend a lifetime attempting to analyze the reason for a particular tragic event in his or her life, but never find the answer, at least not on earth, and, if he or she is a believer, by the time he or she makes it to heaven, the answer will either be clearly evident, or it will no longer matter.

Job believed that God was good, that everything He did was for a good purpose, that His desire was to bless the righteous and punish the wicked.  However, Job felt that God had completely reversed His ways upon His creation, particularly where Job was concerned.  He couldn’t reconcile what he knew about God and what God was allowing to happen to him.  It didn’t make sense.  Why was a righteous man undergoing such torment while the wicked were seemingly untouched by the justice of God?

Job could not figure out why he went from blessings and protection of the LORD to the miserable condition in which he now found himself.  What changed?  What had he done to displease God to cause God to nearly destroy him?  Job knew that God had His reasons for how He was allowing Job to suffer, but Job was not privy to those reasons.  “Shall the thing formed say to Him that formed it, Why hast thou made me thus?” (Romans 9:20b).  Most of the time, men and women have no clue as to why God does what He does.  At times, they may have a notion or idea about why things happen the way that they do, but no one can read God’s mind or tell Him what to do.  What we can do is study His word, and all that He desires for us to know will be revealed in the pages of scripture.

Job felt that God was watching him like a hawk.  One tiny slip-up, one false step, one word of complaint, or one roll of the eyes, and God would lower the boom upon him.  He felt unfairly singled out among everyone in his community in order to be an example of what happens when one steps out of line, although he did not believe that he had stepped out of line.  Job had no real hope that God would acquit him.  Even as he maintained that he was a righteous man and not an evildoer, he still felt that he would not receive mercy, but God’s wrath.  He didn’t dare look up to see any redemption coming his way.  The more he tried to hope for relief, the worse it became for him.  He felt God’s indignation increasing against him.  Job felt that God and the entire world was against him.

Job was so depressed and despondent that he reverted back to his original statements concerning why he was ever born.  Why give life to someone when that life turns out to be so miserable and painful?  What was the point?  Some scholars put a positive spin on Job’s desire to have never existed.  They purport that his sorrow was because he was unable to glorify God, the purpose of mankind, in his present condition.  However, God can get glory from any situation, and from all indications, Job was not as concerned about God’s glory as he was about his own problems.  He did not mention anything about God’s glory or reputation as Moses did.  Up until now, Job had said nothing about the afterlife.  His only thought was to look forward to the end of his misery, the sooner the better.

Next week:  Zophar Speaks